For SCIENCE!

Sometimes I experiment with food. No, not in a sexual way you perverts, and even if I did, that sort of nonsense would be addressed on my other blog, Gin and Judgment. But, after a lovely lunch outing with Boyfriend, wherein we shared some sort of delicious cheesy melty thing, I took it upon myself to dissect the thing and figure out what was in it and try my damndest to recreate it for our in-home-eating enjoyment.

I love when I get things right on the first try. Experimenting with food, for SCIENCE!

Better-Than-Hot-Pocket

GET THIS:

1 package of large crescent rolls, unrolled into four rectangles

1 cup broccoli florets

1 cup chicken breast, cubed into very small pieces.

1 cup shredded mozzarella cheese

Parmesan cheese and parsley flakes, for garnish

DO THIS:

1. On a greased cookie sheet, lay out two of the crescent roll rectangles for the base crust.

2. Season chicken well with salt and pepper and, you know, whatever.

(This is less of a recipe and more of a set of assembly instructions, so take lots of liberties)

3. Sautee the chicken in light olive oil until thoroughly cooked.

4. While the chicken is cooking, steam the broccoli to desired tenderness. I prefer mine slightly firm because it will continue to soften in the oven as you bake the sandwich/hot pocket/calzone/stromboli/whatever this thing is.

5. Assemble the fillings while still warm. Layer cheese on the bottom crust, top with chicken and finish off with broccoli.

6. Cover the filling with the other rectangle of dough, allowing the natural split (since they're supposed to be triangles, after all) to split, leaving a gap for air to escape and the lovely green color of the broccoli to peek through.

7. Seal the sides well by folding up and around the edges like a pie crust. Oooh, it's almost like a pot pie without the pie pan!

8. Sprinkle the top with shredded Parmesan cheese and parsley flakes.

9. Bake at 350 degrees for 15 minutes or until golden brown and the cheese is all melty and delicious.

Serves 2. Easy to double or triple or even quadruple to make ahead of time. They microwave very well and are full of good nutrients, and no crazy weird preservatives so they bonus as a healthy lunch selection to throw in your purse or super manly messenger bag.

For SCIENCE!

I'm Loaded.

I completely forgot all about this recipe for stuffed baked potatoes until recently. I used to make them all the time when I was commandeering my mother's kitchen as a teenager, discovering new things to combine and new ways to make food an experience, rather than a chore. I attempted them again this weekend, but the potato skins would not cooperate and I had to improvise...

Twice Baked Broccoli Ranch Potatoes

GET THIS
4 large russet potatoes (try to find ones with really thick skin)
1 c. Ranch dressing
1 small bag frozen broccoli, thawed and drained
2 Tbsp. butter
Salt and Pepper to taste
Paprika

DO THIS
1. Preheat oven to 400 degrees.
2. Pierce washed potatoes several times with a fork, microwave on high for 10-15 minutes until mostly cooked. This will speed up the process immensely.
3. Place the potatoes in the hot oven for another 15 minutes. Foil is optional, though it helps give a good dark color to the potato skins.
4. Remove from the oven, slice the tops of the potatoes off lengthwise.
5. GENTLY scoop out the insides of the potatoes with a spoon, taking care not to tear the skins too much (this is also where foil helps. This weekend I had no foil and gave up on the skins after the second one failed me.)
6. Combine the potato innards with Ranch dressing, butter, salt and pepper in a large bowl until thoroughly mixed. You can make it as lumpy or as smooth as your culinary heart desires.
7. Stuff the mixture back into the potato skins, piling it high. Sprinkle generously with paprika.
8. Return to the oven for another 15 minutes.

Serves 4.

If your skins fail you, however, this also makes an excellent loaded mashed potato, which is what I ended up with, paired with steak and lovely conversation.

Racist Chili

It's cold. It's really friggin' cold. Like, it's been below zero all week here in Anchorage. The automatic starter on my truck is refusing to work properly - not that I blame it. My eyelashes are freezing and my glasses fog up when I step outside. It's friggin miserable. Today, I needed something to warm up from the inside out. And I didn't start my apple cider pork stew before I left for work today, so I had to run to the store after work and try to figure out what to make. I texted my roommate and said, "How about white chili with chicken?" To which he responded, "Racist chili?"

RACIST CHILI

GET THIS

2 lbs. chicken breast fillets

2 cans Great Northern beans

2 cans garbanzo beans

2 cans cannellini beans (white kidney beans)

1 can sweet corn

48 oz. (one large box) of reduced fat chicken broth

6, yes, 6 cloves garlic

2-3 tablespoons olive oil

2 teaspoons cayenne pepper

2 teaspoons oregano

1 tablespoon plus 1 teaspoon ground cumin

salt and pepper

garlic salt

thickening flour

onion powder

Shredded cheese

DO THIS

1. Peel and chop the garlic. I didn't chop it very finely, because, well, garlic is awesome.

2. Cut the chicken into small cubes.

3. Sautee the garlic in the bottom of a large stock pot in the olive oil, about three minutes or until tender. Add the cumin, oregano, cayenne pepper, salt, and black pepper, stir well, and add the chicken to the pot. Stir well to coat the chicken evenly in the spice mixture, brown evenly while stirring frequently.

4. Add the chicken broth, stir well, and allow to simmer slightly.

5. Drain all the cans and add the beans and the corn to the pot, stir well.

6. Bring to a high simmer, add garlic salt and onion powder to taste. Stir frequently, simmer uncovered for 15-30 minutes. Add thickening flour to desired thickness.

7. Stir in shredded cheese until completely melted.

Spooky good. It looks innocent, but it packs a spicy bite that is rather unexpected, and serves 8.